Delay...missing paper.

The following is from an email we sent to a group of special folks who specifically are praying for our adoption. I find it interesting that the email from our social worker came in one minute before the encouraging one from our sister-in-law. 

"When I forwarded the email about our fingerprints being sent electronically to our social worker I once again asked if there was any word on our delay. 

With.., this has proved to be quite frustrating but we have provided them with your I600A approval approx. 4 times within the last three months. They have told us that this is the only thing preventing you from exiting. We provide it and then they request it again several weeks or a month later saying they don’t have it. We provide proof (a photo of the doc with the person’s signature that accepted it) but they still say they don’t have it. Our man, J, as well as a... staffer has provided it to them. It’s really getting to where J just carries it with him every time he goes there, just in case they need it again.

We’re expecting any day though, unless they come up with another reason we’re still waiting.

This paperwork (I600A) was turned in as well in May and our original copy in August. Please pray that this issue is resolved today and no other problems. My sister-in-law wrote today an email how she changed up her prayers for F. An adoptive parent reminded her that Satan does not want children adopted into Christ filled homes and will fight the process. Here’s part of her e-mail

I don't know why I have dismissed this idea in the past, well I guess I do, Satan loves it when we blame things on life or the system, when it is him.  He is constantly wreaking havoc.

So I am praying that he gets out of the way, that he stops putting things in the way of the officials and hiding your paperwork.  I am praying that he stops interfering with your family, and soon to be new son.

I hope this help you and encourages you.  This week lesson has been all about strapping on the belt of truth, girding ourselves in truth.  Remember God's truths, and fight back!

Praying that the hidden paperwork is found TODAY. [Note my sister-in-law doesn’t know yet about the paper being submitted 6 times] Praying for protection on each paper and signature in our chart. Praying for protection-physical, mental, and emotional- for each person involved in the process. 

Thank you for fighting with us.  Living in Haiti where Satan’s followers will celebrate this Friday that Christ died and was defeated. We are often reminded of his power but we know that the LORD WILL Be Victorious! Our God Reigns. He’s NOT dead or defeated!

Happy Easter, 

Cory, Kris, Eli, Anna, and F"

While I'm waiting..answered prayer!

Ten months ago we sat with the social worker for our second meeting during our socialization. Hopes ran high following the 15 month wait for our referral.

I would never have guessed that ten months later we would still be waiting for word that our case entered courts...sigh. More than double the average of other families.

Do not want to be facing a longer wait. Do not want to be in the middle of struggling how to get our I600 fingerprints renewed with the office in Port-au-Prince not responding to our email or phone message.

After a few months of peace or maybe indifference when I found my expectations muted and my hyper-vigilence of checking our emails frequently gone I find my hopes rising again with the spring breezes.

I know the Lord will move our chart in His timing...I also know that the next two weeks the IBESR staff has said they will be working to get referrals out to the I600 families. If these families do not get a referral by April 1st they will need to redo their paperwork for a I800 [Hauge convention] visa.

I'll admit to hoping that maybe our chart is in a pile of I600 charts and will be found [completed] and moved to the pick-up desk. 

While watching a video yesterday I found a new song of encouragement, John Waller's 'While I'm waiting'.

So while you pray for our fingerprint appointment, for our case to move from IBESR to courts would you also pray that we wait well...that we will continue to serve the Lord and worship Him wholeheartedly while we wait.

Edited to add: Just minutes after posting this we heard that we do NOT need a fingerprint appointment at the Embassy as they can resubmit our fingerprint data electronically. Praying that they know the truth and what we heard earlier about needing to have them redone was wrong. We should hear about our clearance in a couple weeks.

Prayers please. Fingerprints

I ignored it as long as I could hoping we would have heard by now that we've completed one step and moved into courts.

However the time has come to face the fact that we need to be looking into renewing our fingerprints once again for our I-600 visa paperwork.

You may remember how this was an issue the first time, since we live in Haiti...we ended up showing up at the USA Embassy and a lady did our prints.

When the time came to renew we asked again, were advised to go to the Embassy. When they didn't respond to our emails we showed up for a walk-in visit and were told that the prints could not be done.  Later our prints were 'refreshed'.

Sweet Potato

Our 'refreshed' fingerprints will expire the end of April, therefore we're to ask for an appointment 2 months in advance...which is now.

The actual expiration date of our approval is Nov. 21, 2016. If we do not have F and his visa before then we understand that we will need to start over again and file for a I-800 because Haiti is now a Hauge country. 

While I know the Lord is in charge and has a plan....I'll admit that dealing with governments and unknowns makes me nervous, a bit stressed.

Thank you for praying.

Philippians 4:6-7a "Don't worry about anything; instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all He has done. If you do this you will experience God's peace."

Praying. Know God knows what we need better than we do. Thankful. Needing God's peace.

Waiting = Grief.

Thankful to receive a bit of news today that F continues to do well and had a few really good weeks.

Thankful for all the prayers for him and our adoption.

I've lately come to the realization that our long wait for our referral and now to exit IBESR, has me cycling through the Kugler-Ross stages of grief.


Denial-it will not take us that long. Maybe TODAY. Maybe the next stages will go fast. Maybe soon..

Anger-being mad at the IBESR folks, for red tape, at governments, for the folks who messed up in the past causing more rules and regulations to be put in place to safeguard children and families, and even mad at God for not stepping in with a miracle or two, for not meeting our expectations in a timely fashion. At myself for not trusting enough, for getting depressed and stressed, for not having the faith to move mountains, for not learning what every lesson it is that I should have down by now but still don't...because maybe if I GOT IT then the Lord would allow us to move forward.

Bargaining-what if we do this, we're willing to do x,y, and z. What if I fast more? What if I go to church every day? What if we get more people to pray? What if....

Depression-Sadness I rapid cycle with this stage and often it occurs along with the other stages. I mourn the time we've lost, the days and smiles that we will never share with F. Each holiday that passes, each week, each day that turns into history means memories that we will not share with F or he with us.

Acceptance-this one comes rarer but it does come. Never lasts long but the peace that accompanies accepting the Lord's plan soothes the soul. Makes me fight all the harder to focus on the Lord and pray for His will. Striving for it sends me into the Word and on to my knees because...I know I can only get to and stay in this stage with the Lord's help. I need His help to STOP striving and let Him act on our behalf. I need to trust. I need to rest in His love, rest that His plan is good. His power enough.

Some days I may spend a bit of time in each stage and other days I may remain in one. Some days like holidays I can predict will be harder to stay positive but other days I jump from stage to stage in sporadic randomness. Both ways drain and tire.

Like playing a non-fun game that's full of delays, skip a turn, go-back-to start, but no fast forward cards. This week the doors of IBESR will remain closed due to Carnival [maybe also politics?]

Praying the staff remain safe, enjoy their break and all head back to work on Monday the 15th ready to make major progress in the waiting cases.

Praying that Haiti's new interim government, who will work to get elections set up during the next few months will allow IBESR to continue as normal, as well as the other stages of adoptions in Haiti.

Praying that our faith continues to grow as we wait. Praying to wait well. Praying to learn to trust more and spend more time in the 'acceptance' zone. Praying we're ready to act when the Lord says act!

Praying that F continues to do well and grow and thrive. Thankful for those caring and loving him during the wait.

Thank you Lord.

Coping with the wait.

With a long wait you would think one would adjust to waiting, that it would become 'normal'.

I really thought back in October when we filled for another I-600 extension that it would be the last time. My hopes rose with the thought that in three months we may have all the documents needed and would be rejoicing in the progress made... but today filling for yet another I-600 extension [number 3] I just wonder if anything will happen in the next three months.

Some feelings do become predictable...the increased hope on a Monday morning, the average sustained hope through Tuesday, Wednesday with starts to wane sometime on Thursday only to surge a bit on Fridays, pumped up with the desperate thought that surely you will NOT have to wait another weekend for news.

The clock moves slow some of the time and others it seems to rush to the end of business hours-killing the hopes for that day.

Some of my 'normal' coping strategies for stress in my life remain firm like music, chocolate, and reading.

Other strategies come and go...some days I do my best to fill my schedule with mind occupying jobs so to distract me away from checking e-mails frequency while other days I may stay occupied on the computer so I can see each email as it enters the in-box.

For a long time it was hard to hang out and interact with the smaller children on campus but now it helps.

The first few years of this journey I could count on going to church to be positive but now it's becoming more and more tinged with sorrow and frustration.

Some weeks I can read adoption books or blogs and then I avoid them for a while.

I generally try to start new healthy habits throughout the year and therefore do not make New Year's resolutions. This year I did turn over a new leaf... have already turned over thousands of new leaves, and old leaves.

Most afternoons you can now find me, for an hour or two in the tree nursery.

POSITIVES: helping Cory get jobs off his to-do-list, extra one-on-one time with Cory to talk, when alone-more music and prayer time, hours of weeding done, nicer looking yard/nursery, being outside, exercise, many trees-potted/planted, not watching the clock or checking e-mails/facebook.

NEGATIVES: need to put on lots of bug spray, mosquitos, fire aunts, itchy plants, scrubbing hands and feet especially under the nails every night, thorns, slivers.

Year Two in IBESR ... done.

If you look to the side bar time-line you'll note that we only made one step forward in 2014, entering IBESR on January 14th as file number 42.

How I would love to write under 2016 January 14th, file # 42 exited IBESR.... but at this point only the Lord knows.

Really hoping we do NOT have to start year three.

Our house...waiting.

Can He open the doors and let us out of IBESR? YES!

Can He allow us to hear about exiting today? YES!

Will He?
Do not know but will continue to trust Him, praise Him and worship Him even if not!

We did not learn we entered IBESR back in 2014 until the end of January so I do not know how we spent the day.

I do know we prayed about our match, our paperwork and our 'children' because that has occurred daily since we started this journey.

We remain thankful that during the wait many caring people care for and surround F with love. Any news about him is precious and I'm thankful to hear bits and pieces now and then.

This week we heard he is ready to come 'home' and tells everyone he meets that he is going to his 'forever family'.

We think we are as ready as we can be as well...
So we do what we can do, continue to pray and praise.

Tired

While I'm thankful to see this morning that someone exited yesterday from IBESR I still wonder why not us?

Yes, they entered the same month we did, but they matched in September and bonded in October, so only a little over two months to exit.

 Eight months ago, the last signature for our referral was added to our chart. We matched and bonded in early May.


In 9 days we will be 2 YEARS in IBESR. [1, 257 days since the door opened to our adoption journey]

Honestly, I'm tired of waiting.
   Tired of praying to exit.
   Tired of wondering when F will come home.    
   Tired of not being able to make plans without
       having to add 'depending on our adoption
       timeline'.
   Tired of waiting to order kindergarten supplies.  
   Tired of speculating about F's homecoming.
   Tired of guessing when we get to see him again
       and how our interactions will look like now
       that he knows we are his family.
   Tired of puzzling over the delays.
   Tired of thinking about renewing paperwork or starting visa paperwork over again.

• I confess my weaknesses to my support team so that you can pray.
• I thank the Lord for our support team and F's team providing care of him and pouring love and attention into his life.
• I turn up the volume on praise songs and repeat my encouraging 'adoption play list' songs. 
• I choose to keep my eyes on the Lord. 
• To say I will wait on Him. 
• I ask for the strength and wisdom to wait well. 
• I will pray for His will. 
• I call on His strength to hold us up. 
• I request that F and all of us will remain full of hope and confidence in our heavenly Father. 
• I stand on His promises. 
• I request intervention and miracles. 
• We claim victory. 

This morning in church a young man shared a story and repeated this verse several times.

Psalm 50:15 "call upon me in the day of trouble. I will deliver you, and you will honor me"

also saw this one this morning in a blog Psalm 71:14 "As for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more. "

Lord deliver us. Lord we will honor you even during the wait. Lord help us to always have hope in You and praise You!