Christmas 2016.

I think back at the mixture of hope and disappointment that accompanied Christmas last year and could have never dreamed that it would once again be with us as we celebrate Christmas 2016.

Every year the weight of waiting grows. Seeing the pictures of F warm my heart but at the same time stirs up pain as we see him growing up without being home.

Every day minutes and hours slip by that could have been filled with family time and memories, that we will never get to experience with him.

I can picture him here as I look at the stocking with his name on it hung in the middle of the others.

As I look at each family gathering and the cousins all laughing and enjoying family, I can't help to think about F and wonder about what he is doing.


I look at the Christmas tree ornaments that Grandma carved for him and wonder when he will get to hang them on the tree.

I think about the ornament that holds the picture of the twins, baby boys who joined my family so many years ago on LaGonave...the dream to adopt that did not happen due to the legal process in Haiti.

I know the Lord had a plan for them even though they never legally joined the family and only lived in our home for 6 months. I know that the prayers over the years have been a positive impact in their lives.

We do not know what 2017 will hold but we trust the Lord. He is good. He loves F and our family and has a plan. He is in control even when we hurt and don't understand.

Lord surround each of us with Your love, peace, and patience. Please open the doors to bring F home soon. We thank You for starting us on this journey and making F part of our family even through we remain apart. We give you the glory and honor. Thank you.